There is no band more consistently, doggedly embarrassing in America than Maroon 5.

Their halftime performance at Super Bowl LIII was no exception. Viewers were subjected to Adam Levine's exposed, erect nipples and guitar solos fit for a middle school battle of the bands.

Nobody captured this cultural collapse better than Twitter.

I'm sorry, but you just can't have Adam Levine hopping to a hip-hop beat like he's at a ska show -- then crooning with an *actually* talented gospel choir -- and not expect people to mock it. It's part of our cultural algorithm.

Travis Scott provided a moment's respite with his nod to SpongeBob SquarePants, but not even Big Boi could save the show for Adam Levine, who is essentially a sentient tapioca pudding.

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Cardi B for Super Bowll LIV anyone? I've heard playlists at CVS pharmacy that had more bite than this show.

Please NFL, give us anyone else.